One of those weeks with some lessons learned...

I really have been meaning to post but it has just been one of those weeks. It started out pretty well but later in the week Josie got sick with a fever and a cold. I took her in to the doctor but her ears were clear and the flu test was negative. I was glad to hear that but hoped for some medicine for a fix...didn't happen. I know, not everything needs medicine but I HATE seeing my baby sick. We were so blessed with Riley, she was hardly ever sick so this is new for me! The first time she got sick she was about 15 months old and it was very minor. Since then maybe once or twice so when Josie came down with an ear infection a month or so ago, I must admit I cried when the doctor told me! I know, some of you must think I'm crazy...sickness is going to happen but I'm just having a hard time with it.

Anyway, Josie is still under the weather, no temp but her nose is streaming and she has a horrible cough, especially when she lays down. If it's not better in a day or so, this worrying mommy is taking her back to the doc. (And of course, I've caught whatever she has and feel terrible but mommies don't get time to be sick, right?)

On top of having a sick baby, I feel like I overloaded myself a bit last week with little jobs and things I'd committed to do for people. Nothing too major but each one together wore on me.

Then came payday for Phil...ugh. We had to add me to his health insurance this year so that came out of his January check...again I say ugh. As much as I know that God is our provider and He will take care of us it's hard not to get a little discouraged and let worry creep in. But, what does worry do about it...nothing so all we can do is keep trusting in God to provide...at least we even have a paycheck, right?

Needless to say my attitude probably hasn't been the best this past week, plus I've been devoting a lot more attention to Josie with her being sick and Riley could tell. It's funny how intuitive kids are...if I'm in a grumpy mood or she senses that I'm distracted, she will do everything in her power to get my attention, good or bad. Now I am definitely not saying she's been bad but she has been a bit trying. It's hard not to get mad and just react in anger but I am trying hard to let God teach me patience and deal with her calmly. I have to remind myself constantly that she is human and, on top of that, she's just 3 years old!

Now, Saturday came and I had a laundry list of things to get accomplished...didn't happen. Instead I had a sick baby, crying because she'd pulled a piece of dollhouse furniture off and it smacked her in the nose and left a little cut. I was wiping snot and blood in one swoop when Riley started hopping around with a small inflated ring around both of her legs, binding them together. I kept telling her she needed to stop or she might fall...can you predict what happened? Long story short, she fell into a table, sliced her chin open, and we landed in my father-in-law's office for stitches! STITCHES! I didn't get my first set of stitches until I was an adult and I was a pretty active kid. Needless to say, she was not happy about getting stitches and it took three of us to hold her down. After the fact, she is fine and actually shows off her boo-boo like it's a badge of courage! I dread having to get them taken out though...

Well in the midst of all the craziness, I found myself emotionally and physically drained on Saturday afternoon. I had not brushed my teeth nor had a shower at that point so I asked Phil just for a few minutes to myself. After my shower, I spied a dress I'd bought for Josie for Christmas and had been meaning to return. Couldn't do that though because I couldn't find the receipt! So on top of the overwhelming feelings I already had, I started beating myself up for the fact that my house was such a mess that I couldn't even find a silly little receipt! Then something (not just something, God) told me to look in the last purse I'd used...sure enough there was the receipt. That little instance blessed me as much as getting a $100 check in the mail. To think, I'd had a stinking attitude and probably grumbled more than I should have this week but God was still thinking of me and blessing me, even in the smallest details.

Now for the lesson I've learned from all this...I found myself frustrated at times with Riley this week when she showed selfishness or I felt like her maid. Yet, here I was being just as selfish, busy with all MY to do's, asking God to meet MY needs, griping about MY life, and He still loved me unconditionally, dealt with me patiently, and blessed me over and over. What an awesome and loving father I serve. I can only try to deal with my children with the same love and patience and pray everyday that He'll enable me to do so.

To end all of my rattling on, I wanted to share a picture of what I long to have. One night, Riley turned on a praise and worship song and just danced and sang with no inhabitions. She raised her hands, bowed down, and twirled in God's presence. I long to have that innocence and fearlessness to just worship God with all of me, despite having one of those weeks...